Ok well I'm listening to this on shitty speakers so I apologize for that right away. I'm in a mood for some real noisy kinda ambient stuff right now too, so that's probably influencing my opinion of this big time. So feel free to just ignore everything I say.
The manipulated thump thing was pretty excellent. The rest was real simple, sorta generic. As I'm sure you're aware, there's not much here so there's not much to comment on. It's definitely on the ambient side of ambient. Space-y more than scary, I think. Otherwordly-like. I'm mostly just left curious about what the more complex version of this sounded like.
Anyways, I guess the worst thing I can say about it is that it's sorta workmanlike, nothing too interesting but certainly nothing terrible. Sorry for the shitty review, it's late. Can't think of much I'd like to hear changed that wouldn't remove it from the ambient category, and I don't want to demand you switch genres or anything. Drop me a line if you do something a bit less ambient and I'll try to come up with a not shit review.
Until then, keep it up.
Thanks, I havent really made a track like this in awhile I should because I think I could do a hell of a lot better, Ill try to work on the complexity.
pretty moody experimentation going on
Alright, by the nature of this thing it's a bit hard to review I think. I mean, you're just improvising it all right? So it is what it is. Certainly not much of a song as is, but I think there's some stuff here that you could flesh out or expand on so I'll focus on those positives.
First off, I think for a 'random song' there are some surprisingly good transitions and different parts. Certainly a few clumsy shifts/sections, but that's all part of the process I'm sure. The shifts from the moody plucking to the major sounding chords back to more minor intervals were certainly in good taste; I think you should look at those sort of parts if you think about fleshing any of this out. Some parts (like the one at around 3:40ish) also stand out on their own, and could be good. The more cheerful strumming afterward is a pretty good resolution too, if you played with it.
So yeah, as hard to listen to it as it is in this form, there are certainly more than a few good ideas (more than I touched on, at least) in here, that you could really turn into a song with some work. I'd forget about some sections (like from about 5:10 on), but there are certainly good ideas here, which is very impressive for 'improvised randomness.'
It's pretty neat, and do let me know if you turn any of this into a more complete song, 'cos I'd love to check it out. And I really apologize for how long it's taken me to review back! Keep it up.
Thanks for the great review. I'll see if I can do anything to improve on this and make at least a half-assed song out of it. I'm surprised you were patient enough to listen to the whole thing, as I talked to Courtney the entire time I played it, and still got pretty bored. No worries, it's all good.
My apologies for not making the song more interesting, as well as not responding sooner.
Not a lot to say about this one. Sounds go well together, some really neat work on the different synths. Percussion is pretty much exactly how you'd expect it to be after listening to the intro, doesn't really surprise anywhere. Not a whole lot of progression throughout, not a whole lot of emotion...I dunno, you're not taking any risks here, so it is what it is.
If you're stuck, I'd consider changing up some parts, getting away from the ambient frame of mind, figuring out something that's surprising but fits. Add some emotion, add some uncertainty, make it less pristine. Of course, it's just an opinion, and if you're not going for that at all, ignore me.
It's always nice to get some opinions and constructive comments on a track, but yeah, I wasn't really going for anything special, just a really simple chillout track.
Some great elements in here, doesn't always add up
First, some notes:
Pretty big bass sound there, digging echo/reverb. Not sure how well the sound works in an ambient song, though. Looking at it without considering genre, I'd say it was interesting- maybe fell a bit on the cheesy side with repeated listens.
Percussion is pretty trippy; interesting, neat stuff...I'm liking it. Composition, sound, I think you really nailed it.
Digging the background stuff, more often than not. Some cool sounds, not always sure if they fit. Enjoyed the throwaway string sounds more than the warm/soft pads, I think. I'm hearing some things the second/third/whatever time through I didn't hear the first time through, which is always good.
Crazy lead from about 1:20 on. Not especially liking it, melody wise or sound wise. Seems out of place.
I like the structure, you certainly keep it varied and interesting. I'm never bored by the song, even with repeated listens. That's definitely a good thing. The song evolves, sounds bounce off each other, react. It feels organic, which is a tough thing to accomplish using sounds like these, I think.
With the soundscape, you are creating a lot of space. Feels pretty expansive, pretty mellow. Unfortunately this contributes to that one lead synth's and the bass sound's cheesiness, but that's opinion, of course. Also kinda makes it feel reserved, held back...not a strong sense of emotion. Again, opinion, some would probably disagree with me there.
Suggestions? Retool that bass sound, lead sound, really play around with those pads to make it all fit a little better. Maybe think about adding some stuff to compliment the great percussion, run with it...but that might lead it to not really be an ambient song, so keep that in mind. I think you've certainly got room for improvement, but it's still good as is. Sounds like work and thought went into it, so you deserve credit for what you have here.
Keep it up, drop me a PM if you work on this some more, update it, whatever...I'd be happy to take another listen if you do.
Hey Thanks for the awesome review!
good news ... The bass has already been fixed. when i was first writing this song i was using a different key signature. thats why it sounds off and the fact that it stands out from all the other sounds like a sore thumb.
the plan here is that this song will be actually played with my real bass guitar and recorded into the mix. and i have figured out how to make it sound even better on my guitar.
The other plan is that i am also having my roomate play the main melody. of the guitar part. he has been practicing hard to learn to play the notes fluently.
so the two biggest issues with the song are already on the surface for next revision.
The genre like you said... I dont go by it, NG doesn't have a good selection and most of my music is downtempo IDM.
I will pm you with future revisions. its going to become much cooler and everything nailed to sound great!
A couple of things:
A couple things: this song is really nearly unlistenable because of that vocal thing. I mean I get that you made the song for a reason and that it's a big part of it, but this is really an example of something just sounding awful. The next biggest issue is the percussion, which really doesn't demonstrate anything creatively. It's just very, very standard, in composition and sound. Most of the sounds in here are really generic sounding, really. There are some cool sounds (like the distorted analogsounding thing up until like :26), but for the most part they're in the minority.
I dunno, it's tough to leave such a negative review. It's just that this song is a really, really big miss. I'm sure you can do better, and if you start something else and want to share, let me know. Again, I apologize for how negative this is, but I really just couldn't find much to like in this one. Feel free to just ignore me, nothing's that serious.
I think this thing is has enough energy and intensity to be good, but I think it really needs some work.
It needs a beginning, first off, one that really will build anticipation until it breaks out in that intensity. Also, I think the sounds need some work: the fast one just sounds fast and generic, the other ones are varying between generic and annoying, and that's not really good for the song. Also the entire thing is too repetitive, in my opinion. I'd like to hear some more interesting percussion, and some better mixing to make it all gel better.
Keep working at it.
Hm, as for the lack of a proper beginning you mentioned, it was actually made on purpose, to give it a 'straight-to-the-point' sort of feel, I didn't want to build the tension from the ground up this time, but create a feeling that you have been dropped straight into the center of intensity. As for the sounds, they are currently the best I have, but I actually found them to my liking because I don't often use such synths. And the percussion was meant to be very primitive and raw, because this was meant for depicting any act of aggression or similar thing. Not to brag, but drums usually aren't my weak point: this time I just wanted to keep them at a minimum.
I'll probably get back to this song in a while, and I'm sure that at that point, your advice will be more than useful! Thanks a lot for commenting.
It's neat you recorded this, but the recording/mixing quality is pretty awful at times, unless all that distortion was intentional in which case I really didn't like it.
The composition really doesn't move me either; it seems more bland than depressing. I dunno, really doesn't click for me.
That said, I think if you keep at it you could get something cool soon.
No, the distortion wasn't intentional.
I recorded this a long time ago with a crappy amp on sound recorder by hooking it up via microphone cord with amp plug on the end.
thanks for the review.
This is really good. One of the best things I've heard on the audio portal in awhile. I love all the variation, I love how it gets edgier from about one minute on until the end, and I loved the end. I love all the different sounds, I think they all go really well together and are interesting. It's not often that I really can't think of anything I'd change, but for this one I don't know what to say. Maybe the breakdown before it gets really good at about 1:02 could be improved a little; instead of just going to percussion only maybe you could do something musically for that transition. But that's really just an opinion.
Overall, this is a really, really good job. Keep it up.
never though of it, plus im still learning how to use FL
thanks for your words : ) ill keep em in mind
A good starting point.
Alright, your first song ever. That's pretty awesome, first off.
Secondly, I think you've got a lot of things going for you, the best of which is musical direction. I really like how you've got some pent-up energy here, especially in the percussion, but you never allow it to become that same generic garbage techno we've all heard a million times. You've also got a lot of ambient tendencies, but you never allow me to snooze off like I'm prone to during some of those completely boring pure ambiance songs. So I think you've got the right idea genre-wise, and as long as you stay away from trying to emulate most of the music here on newgrounds I think you've got a lot of good music ahead of you.
That said, you're really not there yet (and you probably shouldn't be). I don't really like the background progression melody you have going on most of the time... it doesn't really flow the way it probably should. The arpish melodies are a bit cheesy too. Work on composition definitely, but I don't think anyone has good composition coming out of the gate. I think you've got the right idea with combining different sounds to create a nice texture; but really work on making those sounds your own. I think I can recognize some preset sounds in here, and if they're not they sound that way- if you want it to really convey what you're feeling, you're going to have to be very specific with the sounds you make. Some transitions, too, felt sort of aimless. Work on melodies, work on sounds...we all need to do it.
So, yeah, you're certainly off to a good start for your first song. My first stuff was throwing together loops that weren't my own, so you're miles ahead of me so far. Keep on working on it, don't be afraid to not submit things for weeks or months, just be sure you keep pouring effort into improving.
Good luck. (and a neutral score, because it doesn't really matter at this point)
This one is actually pretty tough to review. On one hand, you've got what is possibly the best set of sounds I've heard used together on this site, with a couple of different parts of the song each woven together completely seamlessly and effectively. The percussion is perfectly fitting, the intro is cool, the ending is ridiculously good....
...but on the other hand, the composition for whatever the main voice is at the parts of the song is really repetitive. It seems like you've got a ton of great texture here- it'd be really interesting if you could change up that main melody a bit, maybe even add some more complex melodies the softer parts of the song (where they'd be best suited)...and I know, I know; it's industrial but it still felt lacking melody-wise.
That said, it is a pretty short song, and it does scream "badass" at all frequencies. The sounds used and the textures created are simply top of the line, especially for Newgrounds. So I really can't take off too many points for the melody's repetition, can I? But I do think there's real room for improvement there.
Great job, overall. The effort in here is phenomenal.
First let me respond by giving a particularly loud and and appropriately distorted "Thank You" for the great review!
I agree with you 100% on the melody. That's exactly what my brother said the first time he heard the uncompleted project, and he's the one who got me started on NG because he knew I'd get some constructive feedback on it. I'm that part was fulfilled to my best expectations so far.
Originally I intended this piece to be simply my re-introduction to SawCutter and ACID, and was more of a steroidal experiment to me than anything. The lead instrument is 100% SawCutter noise and the vocals were made to match the melody with SawCutter as well. I think you'll find it interesting that one of the last things I did for this track was the intro, which is why I got more daring in switching up the chords on the lead there, and using the reverb slider to drive you more effectively into the main melody.
My intention after the first minute was to establish a relationship between the male and female aspects of the song (male being the distorted bass/guitar melody and female being of course the ILONA! vocals), then listen to them come together through chaos in a harmonic stereo dance. This leads into their separation as the female breaks the harmony at the high point of the relationship and leaves the male to to drift away to the side, and as she realizes what she lost she tries in vain to return to the original melody and is left to simply drift away into solitude herself. Actually, almost every instrument has a specific spiritual/personal role in this piece, and I really do wish I had thought to do more with it at the time.
That said, I'm (usually) philosophically against remixing my own material only because I feel, philosophically, that after I give life to a piece of music it should be left alone as its own entity, the free will of which I should not try to alter. Yeah, it's weird, but it means that much to me ;-]
However, I do plan to get back to using SawCutter a lot more now that I'm in an experimental mood, so you can look forward to hearing the same sort of work without the repetitive melodies (hopefully, haha).
Thanks again for the constructive remarks and the exceedingly positive review. I genuinely appreciate that and I'm certainly looking forward to discussing other projects with you in the future.
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